Summary: At Newark Airport in New Jersey, Hawk arrives and just as he steps out to the curb, he encounters Law, a MP with a dog named Order. Law is armed and hints at threatening Hawk, using the dog as a warning. He forces Hawk into a jeep driven by Lt. Falcon. Hawk isn't very happy with the idea, but has no choice.
Meanwhile, in the New Jersey marshes, Zarana and Buzzer arrive at the Dreadnoks gas station hide-out to fill up the cycles' gas tanks. They find a hose leading from the ground, siphoning out gas. They follow the hose to a the nearby river, where they find a small trash barge with the two thieves aboard. Buzzer recognizes Monkeywrench -- a former Dreadnok that he knew in Australia-- and Zarana recognizes the "pirate" Zanzibar. They're stealing back the bad gas that Zanzibar sold to Zartan. Buzzer and Zarana hop aboard the barge and start beating on the fuel thieves to teach them a lesson. Zanzibar tries to stop Zarana, telling her they can make a deal. "I have some information that might be very interesting to Zartan and his Cobra friends..." Zarana is willing to listen.
The jeep carrying Hawk and his abductors arrives at an abandoned resort on the Jersey Shore -- a string of hotels and casinos that failed miserably. They arrive at one of the hotels and are met by a big man in a loud shirt that Hawk notes "looks like as escapee from 'Hawaii Five-O'." He introduces himself as Chuckles and introduces Hawk to Fast Draw, "the guy in the blast-proof suit". Hawk isn't too interested in meeting his kidnappers, but Falcon assures him that they've only taken him temporarily. He explains that until they were approached by Chuckles that morning, he and the others thought they were members of the G.I. Joe team. Chuckles says that he's an undercover agent with Army intelligence, and learned about the three "Joes" while investigating a high-ranking government official with ties to extremists in the Pentagon. To convince Hawk, they show him a massive missle silo hidden inside the hotel. Years back, during an inspection of missiles in the U.S., officials had one too many and hid it within the hotel. Falcon, Fast Draw and Law were told they had been assigned to the Joe team and were charged with guarding the missile.
At the Pentagon, in Washington D.C., an unnamed politician arrives at the office of an Army general. He informs the officer that Chuckles is on to them. The general dismisses the problem: "We can take care of him." But the politician explains that others have been brought into the picture and shows him photos of Hawk and Law at the airport. They agree that they can't just get rid of Hawk, and they'll have to activate "the remote".
Back at the hotel, Chuckles shows Hawk that the missle is aimed directly at Cobra Island. Just then, an old woman steps inside, asking where the tour bus is. The Joes try to stop her from leaving, but she rushes out of the hotel, revealing herself to be Zarana in disguise. The Joes follow her to the beach, where Buzzer and Monkeywrench are waiting. Zarana tells Buzzer to take his motorcycle and head to the Cobra Consulate in New York to warn them about the missile. Buzzer takes off as the Joes rush the Dreadnok cycle, now carrying Zarana and Monkeywrench -- manning the bike's machine gun. As the firefight begins, the hotel facade opens up and the platform carrying the missile rolls out, beginning the first stage of its launch procedure. "That renegade creep in the Pentagon must have activated it by remote!" As the fight continues, Zanzibar arrives on his hovering Air Skiff. Hawk orders Fast Draw to destroy the missile with his portable rockets, but the other Joes have taken to the only cover on the beach -- the missile platform. They can't get off of the platform with the Dreadnoks shooting at them, and The Dreadnoks think the Joes are trying to protect the missile. The Joes get Monkeywrench to hold his fire long enough to let Law's dog, Order, attack him. Chuckles dives off of the platform and onto Zanzibar's skiff, fighting the Dreadnok as the skiff goes out of control.
Miles away, Buzzer arrives in New York, riding his bike like a madman through the streets of Manhattan until he arrives at the Cobra Consulate and drives right through the front door and into the express elevator.
Back on the beach, the Joes and Dreadnoks can't stop fighting long enough to destroy the missile and it prepares to launch. Zanzibar's skiff and the Dreadnok cycle collide just as the missile roars off into the sky. The Dreadnoks start pounding on Chuckles, but run for it as the Joes come to help. The missile is making its way towards Florida when its destroyed by a missle from a Cobra attack copter, carrying Buzzer and a crew of Cobras. The chopper picks up the Dreadnoks and they head for home. The Joes check on Chuckles who is okay, possibly to due to the extreme hardness of his head, according to Falcon. Hawk tells them that they did well, and that as far as he's concerned, they're on the G.I. Joe team for real. --"The dog, too?" --"Especially the dog!"
Chuckles arrives at the Pentagon with "one itty-bitty little matter that has to be cleared up." He kicks the general's door down and shouts that they're going to pay and reaches inside his jacket. The politician begs him not to shoot them. "Shoot? Who said anything about shooting?" Chuckles says, pulling a pen out, placing it on the general's desk and turning to leave. "That's to sign your resignations." |
Review: "Cross Purposes" is a mediocre, standalone story that sometimes seems pointless. The story introduces several new characters, as does the previous issue, so the story is probably Larry Hama's attempt to meet Hasbro's "new toy introduction" quota. There are some amusing bits here and there, but the story is often too weird, thanks to a beach resort in New Jersey, a immense missle inside a hotel, and the introduction of a Dreadnok "pirate" and an undercover agent in a Hawaiian shirt.
The story has some interesting elements, including a conspiracy involving some corrupt officials, something that will appear often in the series. Out of the new characters, Chuckles, is the only one that will play any kind of significant role, so its hard to get excited with the new arrivals. Even so, Chuckles becomes an interesting but underused character later on.
Issue #60 is not a bright spot in the series, but it's only a brief stopover before the series' next major storyline takes off in issue #61.
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G.I. JOE #60
Comic Series & Reviews