SWFA: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About the Glove of Darth Vader, but Were Afraid to Ask

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About the
Glove of Darth Vader, but Were Afraid to Ask

The Glove of Darth Vader, Chapter Six:
Ten Minutes to Self-Destruct

Adrick Tolliver

Trioculus goes on alone to retrieve the glove—no doubt he's seen Raiders of the Lost Ark, and knows that when you're out to retrieve a priceless artifact, it's best to leave your friends at home.

Trioculus carries with him a supply of thermal detonators, which he uses to blow open a hole in a large piece of Death Star wreckage. ("KABRAAAA-AAM!") He examines the remains of an energy dish, turbolaser cooling tubes, and ion equalizers (Watto would have a field day here) until he finally spies¹ three black fingertips sticking out from underneath an ion deactivator! Yes, it's the glove of Darth Vader, undamaged by heat or water!

"In fact, the glove looked just as it must have looked when Darth Vader had worn it on his right hand."

This either indicates that Trioculus is ignoring the fact that Luke cut the glove in half with his lightsaber, or that the glove has somehow regenerated itself (I'm thinking self-replicating Mandalorian nano-droids or insta-grow Sith fibers here.)

On the Calamarian minisub, Luke uses underwater macrobinoculars to spot the three-eyed-one returning to the escape sub. Luke asks Ackbar if there is any way to catch up with the submarine before it returns to Dunwell's craft. Ackbar says no, and Threepio wants to retreat, but then Luke remembers the words of Yoda:

"Luke, the coming fight is yours alone. There is no avoiding the battle—you cannot escape your destiny."

Well, they're sorta missing Yoda’s distinct syntax. I guess Luke was paraphrasing. Anyway, he decides not to retreat. Luke considers surrendering (another of Threepio's favorite strategies) in order to infiltrate the Whaladon-hunting submarine, but finally settles on an old Jedi rule of thumb: “attack when the odds are overwhelmingly against you.”²

Ackbar puts the pedal to the metal, and with a "FAZHOOOOM!" brings the sub to a dead stop.

"I tried to accelerate faster than we can go, triggering a systems shutdown," Ackbar explains. Apparently, Ackbar was so busy helping to restore democratic government to the galaxy that he never had time to learn the Calamarian equivalent of a stick shift.

When they get the sub going again, the lights come on, and in a scene remarkably similar to one in The Phantom Menace, the heroes come face to face with a sea monster. In this case it's a giant squid, while the "bigger fish" is Captain Dunwell’s Whaladon-hunting submarine. It seems that Dunwell isn't too picky; if he can't find Whaladons, a squid will do in a pinch. A whirlpool appears, and sucks squid and sub into a storage chamber.

This goes unnoticed by the Aqualish crew, who are occupied playing Sabacc. The book adds an interesting tidbit to the Sabacc lore: it states that the game was made popular on Cloud City. It also says that it is played by both humans and aliens on “dozens” of planets. In a galaxy of “a thousand-thousand worlds,” apparently Sabacc isn't as widespread as everyone thought it was.

As the Aqualish fight over the game,³ Trioculus returns. He has the glove cleaned by Emdee (it's droid clean only) and puts the glove on "slowly, regally, like a king setting a crown on his head." Trioculus can practically feel the dark power of Darth Vader himself flowing through the glove. Whooooo! Who got the power? Who got the power? Trioculus got the power!

As Trioculus, Hissa, Dunwell, and Emdee make their way back to the captain's cabin, they are interrupted by an angry Aqualish. Trioculus sees his chance to use the Power of the Glove!⁴ He points the glove at the Aqualish and ... nothing happens.

Yes, that's right. Trioculus is not a Force-user, and he is completely clueless as to the powers of the Dark Side. Instead, Trioculus uses blue lightning to punish the poacher. It's not Force lightening at all, however, merely a cybernetic implant. Trioculus isn't just clueless—he's a fake.

Left alone with Hissa and Emdee in Captain Dunwell's quarters, Trioculus throws a temper-tantrum. He wanted the power to choke people just by pointing at them. (Wouldn't you?) Hissa reminds him that the glove is more important as a symbol than a physical source of power—now that they have it, Supreme Prophet Kadann, Grand Admiral Grunger, and the other warlords cannot question Trioculus's authority as the new Emperor. He also mentions that using the lightning implant again could kill Trioculus, since he is not yet a True Master of the Dark Side. Well, no duh. It's not clear how, exactly, Trioculus plans to become a True Master of the Dark Side. Maybe he's taking a HoloNet course.

By now, tensions are high between the two Imperial leaders. What should have been a happy occasion turns into an argument, as Trioculus reminds Hissa that he and the Committee promised to share power with Trioculus and keep the fact that he's not really the Emperor's son a secret. Hissa snaps back that the Committee had no choice but to use Trioculus as a figurehead—the real three eyed son of the Emperor is completely insane. (Like this one isn't?)

While they bicker, the ever resourceful Emdee places a set of small gadgets into Vader's glove. These, he explains, will give off a piercing high frequency sound that will "make your victims gasp and fall to their knees. Their eardrums will explode and their brains disintegrate, just like Darth Vader was able to do with his own natural power."⁵

As Emdee upgrades the glove, Luke, Threepio, and Artoo have slipped out of the storage chamber, leaving Ackbar, the sub, and the giant squid behind in case they need to make a quick escape. Moving down the corridor, they see Whaladons imprisoned in other chambers and Captain Dunwell staring at Leviathor. Dunwell doesn't notice the Rebels at first; he's too busy contemplating the information he's just overheard: the good captain had planted listening devices in his cabin, and he now knows that Trioculus is a fake twice over. By the time he notices Luke and the droids, it's too late.

Luke knocks his blaster away, and uses a mind trick to force Dunwell to lead them to a computer terminal. Dunwell doesn't think Artoo will be able to decipher the computer's encryption system, but Artoo replies that Darth Vader's codes used to be much more complicated than Dunwell's, and it never took Artoo more than fifteen seconds to figure them out. He has a point. Luke tells Artoo to arm the self-destruct. But how much time will it take for the Whaladons and the Rebels to escape to a safe distance before the ship explodes? Luke flips back through the book, reads the chapter title, and decides on ten minutes.

Will Luke and the droids escape in time? And will the captain be rewarded? Find out in the next chapter, "The Captain's Reward."

I think I gave something away.…

¹ …with his third little eye, of course.
² This was one of the interesting facts the Davids pulled from James Kahn's Return of the Jedi novelization, another being Hutt hair.

³ Recalling a similar fight over a card game between equally unintelligible Marauders in Ewoks: The Battle for Endor.

⁴ We can assume the "Power of the Glove" action figure line was another Davids-inspired bit of Star Wars merchandising that never saw the light of day.
⁵ Yes, well, even though Vader was fond of choking people, I'm sure he could make their brains disintegrate if he really wanted to. Heck, he disintegrated a whole stormtrooper in Droids #7.

Continue to Part 7 >>

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